I seem to have a two-coat mascara reproduction line, that’s the one with a white end and the other your color of choice. For awhile I thought this was the best mascara ever invented. It guaranteed thick, long, come hither lashes and it appears I stockpiled in fear of the long predicted doomsday scenario! The problem is, at some point I fell out of love with it.
I also have many color options available to me. Black/black, brown/black and black, which I defy anybody to tell the difference between when over a foot away! Then navy, blue, plum, purple and good old boring brown. With all these I still tend to use a coat of black to tone them down and not look like some scary, neon eye lashed pantomime dame! As for brown, I don’t even know why I buy it, I always think it’s too light and cover it in black!
It doesn’t help my addiction that there are so many choices. I Googled mascara and it came back with 12,400,000 hits, no wonder I can’t make my mind up! In the first four pages of hits I came up with twenty-five descriptive words!
Darken/lighten, although why use mascara at all if you want lighter lashes? Thicken and lengthen, surely a phrase more suited to Viagra? High definition, isn’t that some fancy smancy deal for the TV? Deeply pigmented, which I know is currently a ‘hip’ phrase in make-up and has something to do with color, but seriously is it even noticeable to the naked eye? Lightweight, dramatic, sexy, glossy, fatten, lush – all words I’d love to hear in a sentence about yours truly!
Curling mascaras are in another league; 30 degree curve, 50 degree curve, 70 degree, panoramic, and high impact. C’mon, unless I get a protractor out, there’s no way I could tell the difference! Don’t even get me started on L’Oreal’s Motion Mascara which has a vibrating brush. When I first saw an ad for this, I was struck dumb and then had a bloody good laugh.
But without doubt my absolute favorite descriptive phrase for mascara is - “infused with nurturing rose aroma”. The obvious and slightly kinky question being “would you like to sniff my lashes?”
On a happy note, I have finally found a mascara I love, I'm modelling it up top.