Changing Priorities

This year I took the very necessary decision to take decisive action against my thyroid gland. For over two years I have battled with the auto-immune condition Graves Disease, and it was becoming clear the drugs were never going to work.

I chose to keep this decision to myself and only a handful of people knew when I had the procedure done. The months immediately afterwards were a major trial. I was taken off all medication except blood pressure meds and left to work through the aftermath, whilst still working full-time. The new drugs were introduced and 'finding the right dose' started. This has not been easy to say the least!

In fact I will always remember 2009 as my 'lost year'. Until the middle of September I was little more than a zombie on the evenings and weekends. July and early August were the very worst months, I quite literally did nothing but sleep, sit in a daze and sleep some more. Hypothyroidism had set in, plus for awhile I was taking blood pressure meds I no longer needed.

I know many friends have felt neglected or wondered why I was suddenly so unsociable. I think some I lost along the way, but other friends just understood, even when they'd had no explanation. Well it's hard to do anything when your pulse is running at 60 or below and you have no energy! The Hubster was a pillar of strength, never complained about my lack of conversation or activity and just waited patiently.

Well finally everything started to level out in mid-September, the Hubster got his wife back and I finally got some energy back.

But having that time to think has changed my priorities. I no longer find myself inspired to blog regularly, now I want to spend time going in a different direction.

I want to concentrate (when I'm not working) on my fiction writing and developing my passion for photography to it's full potential. I want time to explore yoga and meditation, to help my physical and spiritual being recover from two years of sickness. I need to give time to restore my fighting spirit, 'joie de vivre' and reconnect with friends. And last but definitely not least, I need to spend time with the Hubster enjoying life to the full again.

I am not giving up my blog, I am just reorganising my priorities to where they need to be. There maybe more activity on my photography blog and I will blog here only when I feel the need or get inspired. It may well be more sporadic, but I hope it'll be worth the wait and some of you will still come visit.

I'm normal!

Well my levels of thyroid homone are normal finally after over 3 years on a constant rollercoaster up and down. I had been thinking I was going hypo the past two weeks, but blood tests have confirmed I'm normal, and so I was just 'anticipating' rather than experiencing it seems. And so now I am gonna quit worrying about that (note to self)!

This is definitely a major 'WOOHOO' moment for me, and it means that after some recent concerns it hadn't, the treatment I took seems to have worked. My last two physical exams of my thyroid have indicated that I still have a small amount of the gland remaining as planned. We are praying that this will now keep putting out just enough thyroid hormone, as it is right now.

When I was first diagnosed with the disease I was taking 22 prescribed pills a day and I was really very sick for months. Today I am taking just 1 thyroid replacement pill a day, believe me this is nothing short of a miracle to me!

It will be months before we know for sure if I am stable and more importantly, if I will stay there permanently. But today I am more hopeful than I have been in a very long time and for a change I actually feel pretty well.

Hot to trot - unfortunately!

Been having a few thyroid issues again the past few days, once again I am hyperthyroid; which means I'm like Superwoman, can out multi-task Martha and could probably outlast the Duracell Bunny too!

My nails grow almost as fast as I can nibble them away, my hair sprouts like it's on Miracle Grow, I can eat anything and lose weight, my heart thinks I'm permanently jogging, my BP responds in kind and my bowels overprocess everything on warp-speed! And that last one is my particular problem the past 72 hours!!

Yep hyper is no fun, because you can't enjoy the superhuman benefits when you need to stick close to a loo!

My Endo has increased my meds to control the heart/BP and we both think in about 10 days things will be heading the other way - inshallah (god willing).

Now the Brit' way to deal with 'the trots' is to starve yourself for 24 hours and just sip water or re-hydration drinks. Basically let your internal system have a complete rest and reset itself. And there is a question mark over whether I could have a bit of a stomach bug/flu causing the trots, as a few kids did at school last week.

So as everything else has been slowed down since Friday night, and yesterday I ate normally and it just got worse, I am going to go with this theory and eat nothing today just in case it's the bug. I know over here you advocate things like Chicken Noodle Soup, but I just feel more comfortable with the Brit' way of nothing but water. Having said that once I get past the 24 hour mark at 7pm tonight, CNS will be the first thing I consume!

I am actually hoping this will cure it, as I would rather have the bug going around and not really be that hyper! So any other good tips to help me out (and note, I already have moist wipes!)?

My end of July resolutions!

Well I have let a few things slide over the past 2 months, what with going back to full-time work, having my mum here for about a month, too many social events and too little time!

So here are my absolute 'must do' resolutions to get my life back in order before totally anarchy takes over...and also because in case you haven't already realised this about me, I am a total perfectionist and control freak!

• Get back on Weightwatchers before I undo it all!
• Quit eating out and start cooking
• In bed by 10pm, lights out by 11pm latest
• Start reading again for pleasure
• Get my naturally lazy rear-end back on my treadmill
• Get my home paperwork in order and keep it that way
• Make time to do some fictional writing
• Learn and utilise Photoshop more
• Start taking my vitamins daily again
• Work harder on understanding and controlling my Graves Disease through whole health mind and body techniques, diet and supplementation
• Really learn to meditate and do it regularly

Just a few things to keep me busy then!

Finally got my butt moving!

Yep don't all keel from the shock, but yesterday I actually did some significant exercise and even more amazingly I quite enjoyed it!

First of all I stuck my new DVD of 'The Tudors' in the player and walked on the treadmill for 20 minutes and this definitely helped the time go faster.

Then I mowed our yard (for the first time ever) with a big self-propelled but walk behind gas mower and that took me the best part of 2 hours, as we have a big yard. It might be self-propelled but it still requires walking and effort to turn it, arm work and I was pretty tired by the last section. It was a gorgeous day, I got fresh air, a tan and apart from the last 20 minutes I did enjoy it!

Why did I suddenly get moving, well despite the medication increase last week my BP is still slightly on the climb. So I decided okay I need to get moving and improve my fitness and maybe that will help too.

So I intend to at the very least walk 30 mins most days and I am also going to bike and lift some light weights too.

Hyper' again!

As many of you already know, I have Graves Disease, which is an auto-immune Thyroid disease where you basically swing back and forth between being Hyper/Hypothyroid and the ultimate aim is to get you Euthyroid (remission).

I was diagnosed initially March 30 2007 on the verge of a full thyroid storm and since then have been taking Anti-Thyroid Drug therapy as treatment. Zapping my thyroid with a high dose of radiation (the common treatment here) is not an option, as I am in the 25% of Graves patients with the added complication of Graves Opthamology eye disease. Surgery is also not the best option because of this, as they often take too much away and then the eye disease, which manifests itself as bulgy eyes can get very bad. Having the eye disease also gives you a much lower % chance of remission, but I refuse to give up hope.

So I have regular bloodwork and have learned in the past year to be acutely aware of my body changing and the symptoms; I can tell when I am going off without the bloodwork usually.

For the past 3 weeks my resting BP and Heart Rate and have been steadily rising daily, plus I can eat anything and not gain (the only positive), my nails and hair are on hyperspeed growth, I am covered in bruises, much more jittery/anxious and warmer all of a sudden, when usually I am always cold! So I went for bloodwork last week and found out today I am Hyperthyroid once again and back where I was aprox' last May/June.

I won't bore you with the actual bloodwork (for those who posted last time though, I did get and am waiting on a TSI result), but there are certain levels we have figured out I feel best at and they are all skewed again. We have been steadily decreasing my meds, but it seems it was too fast and so my Dr has increased them all upwards again. Now I go a month and get the tests run and we will see whether the increase has been enough to reverse the slide and get me back in range shortly. Apart from the symptoms I listed above, I am actually doing ok and can work if I don't push myself too hard.

This past year has been an interesting experience for me and has really taught me that nobody knows your body better than you do. I told my Dr today if the tests had not comeback as they did, I'd have called the Lab' a liar I was that certain!

So if you feel things are changing in your body, but not hugely or seriously, maybe just a feeling you have - then please listen to those signs and see your Dr. Last year if I had waited another 48hrs I could have gone into a full thyroid storm which is deadly serious and in extreme cases can be fatal.

So here we go again, but I will keep plugging away and eventually I will get this beat or at the very least get off this up/down rollercoaster!

Back on the rollercoaster

I spent most of today after going blonde again, running around getting tests done for my Graves Disease.

Over the past 10 days I have suspected I was going back into hyperthyroidism and my mum told me I looked like I was, after seeing me on the webcam Friday. I also have Graves Opthamology which is the eye disease, the most apparent symptom being big or protruding eyes.

So today I went to the Optician who took one look at me and said 'yep you're hyper'. Well my eyes aren't protruding yet but they are bigger and the right one more so. But it's something that is very hard to tell yourself, when you see your eyes everyday! So he took a few measurements and confirmed what we both knew already, I have slid too far.

So then off to my Dr, who drew blood and has sent it off for a full thyroid panel & TSH. These will be back tomorrow and then he will call me to increase my medications again and we will try to get me back in range. This will automatically shrink my eyes, lower my BP again and decrease the anxiety that has returned.

This is just life with Graves Disease. I was diagnosed 11 months ago and now know the warning signs of both hyper and hypothyroidism, as with this disease you swing both ways!

So unfortunately I won't be level by my 1 year anniversary, but I will at least be hopefully back in normal range. The problem as we are finding out, is how to keep me there!

Normal at last!

Some of you may argue this point.....but I refer to my thyroid levels not my persona!

After almost 11 months of trying to normalise my thyroid levels following my diagnosis with Graves Disease, my Dr confirmed yesterday 2/3 of the tests are finally normal :-) The best part is they are the important 2 tests, one just scraped in on the bottom rung but it's a great moment and explains why I have been feeling so much better. The other test has now stayed in normal range for 5 weeks and this has given me confidence that the medication is better than the drastic radiation/surgery alternatives.

It seems my healthier diet and many vitamin supplements, are all combining with the med's to make me stronger every month. It also helps having a Dr who believes in the conservative approach and has a personal interest in my disease, I struck lucky the day he took me on.

So the med's are reduced again and this time I will go 6 weeks until the next blood work and hope the levels continue to stabilise.