- Intellect - by far and away the most important thing I looked for - note the past tense. An intelligent and well-informed man is so much more attractive than a cute face and booty. The former will get you through life, the latter will get you some hot dates and some envious comments from girlfriends. Im my early twenties I had a handful of dates with a guy who was the absolute spit of George Micheal at his Wham peak, I mean he literally got stopped in the street and pulled up on stage in clubs. He was a sweet guy, we had lunch in the park, went to a movie and shared a few clinches. But oh my not only was he terribly vain, but he also had no stimulating conversation. So as cute as he looked, I dumped him - nicely. I also dated a gorgeous Cop who was in the Drug agency for a few weeks, but sadly he had no interests outside his perfect hair and his car - so he also got the boot! I need a man I can converse with on every subject under the sun, a man who has knowledge and opinions, luckily I now have one of these under lock and key ;-)
- A wacky/cheeky sense of humour - I have often wondered if Lyle Lovett has this going for him, because I doubt it was his face that snared him Julia Roberts, and she likes to laugh. I have been deeply attracted to a few men in my life who do not 'physically attract' me, but our funny bones have just 'clicked'. A good celebrity example of such a man is Eddie Izzard. He might parade around in leather trousers, mascara and stilleto's at times; but I still find him very attractive, it's all about that glint in his eye and his outrageous humour. If you ever get to see the Hubster doing one of his absurd quirky little dances, you'll know why I love him!
- The crinkly/sparkly/sexy 'eye thing' going on - Marti Pellow of the pop group Wet Wet Wet has this in spades, I used to sit in front of the telly and literally drool over him in my twenties. Years later I know it was probably heroin induced and it's not such a turn on! But he's a world class example of this thing men can do with their eyes, that makes women's knee's wobble! I have always been very susceptible to the 'eye thing'.
- Being tall - I have been attracted to a couple of men my height or slightly shorter in my life. But they both had the SOH and eye thing going on, infact I married one of them and was very happy with him for many years. But they were the rare exception. Being 5ft 7" and never having been a skinny minnie, I have always felt bigger unless my man is taller. So this is pretty much an essential for me, as it's the only time I ever feel like 'the little woman'!
- Stands up to me - I am the first to admit I like to get my own way, but I also know my way is quite often not the right way. So I need a man with the strength to stand up to me and to not take my crap at times. If I get my own way all the time, or feel like I'm the strong one in the relationship, it won't last. Despite making a great show of wanting to be a strong, in control, independant woman, most of the time that's a load of crud and I just want to be looked after and made to feel like 'his' woman. The Hubster gets this and I am very happy as a result. And we wonder why men are so confused these days!
- Flirtation and affection - essentials I had to sneak in as one. Flirting is what makes a girl feel pretty and loved, without it the 'oomph in the relationship' won't last long. Affection makes me feel loved, safe and happy.
- Maturity/age - because of all the above and the fact that many of these take time to develop in anyone, I tend to find older men more attractive.
I just have to add a sneaky #8 here - I have to give 'the voice' a mention. Both John Malkovich and Morgan Freeman can just make me swoon with their voices. But I think John has the sexiest voice ever and I will watch a movie of his, just to hear him speak.So how many of these are your 'thing' with the opposite sex?